I previously wrote about how learning basic conversation skills – similar to learning what it means to be a good friend – can help us to be calmer, more confident and more rational both before and after social situations.
I’ve already covered what I learned from The Social Anxiety Institute’s online therapy course about small talk.
Now I’m going to cover what I learned from the brilliant book Talk by Alison Wood Brooks, starting with the subject of topics.
To start, Alison recommends having some standard, go-to topics up your sleeve that you can whip out whenever required. I already inadvertently introduced this idea when discussing small talk.
Begin to get your brain fired up about topics by thinking about what other, not necessarily small-talk-appropriate topics you love to talk about, e.g. in my case, aside from the weather.
Doing this can help us to understand why we get along better with some people more than others, and thus also clarify how we might identify future friends. If someone loves at least some of the same topics as we do, it feels much easier and more enjoyable to talk to them and thus be in their company, compared to someone who has completely different tastes in topics.
My other favourite topics, in addition to the weather, are:
Plants, gardening, Gardeners Question Time…
Sewing, The Great British Sewing Bee, fabrics, fabric shops, sewing machines…
Style, choosing what to wear, where one shops for clothes, how one organises their wardrobe, how style changes with age…
How the Universe shows up in our lives to guide us, signs from spirit, spiritual experiences…
Goal setting, lists of dreams, people’s highest values and priorities…
Time tracking, using one’s time effectively, how people spend their time, the time taken up by the daily grinds such as doing the dishes and making dinner, general household management…
Reading, writing, publishing, books…specifically commercial fiction and non-fiction
Now tell me, what are your favourite topics? I’m fascinated to know.
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